I hang up after a few more polite thank-yous, and just sit at my desk, stunned.
The thing is, that I had become really excited about the prospect of my very own, much coveted, Christmas present: A permanent, well-paid position, with a good strategic slant and room for development, all wrapped with a shiny bow, and my name on it… After three interviews and enthusiastic feedback, I had rather foolishly allowed myself to believe in Santa.
It’s no consolation that I apparently missed the job by a thread, I feel like rolling on the floor and kicking: Not fair!
So it’s back to square one, to my upcoming six months contract on a laughable wage, having to scrimp on Christmas presents, and constantly worry about the future.
Ooh, and just to make it clear: I’ll punch anyone who dares utter something along the lines of “onwards and upwards”, or “something else will come along”. Ha!
Alright, alright, perhaps, I am reluctantly aware that my situation is not a dent on err… , say South Sudan, but still, being a grown-up sucks sometimes.
And the confidence bubble that had for a while lifted the fog, and put my relationship with Mr Xmas back on sunnier tracks has kind of popped. I am back to doubt, not knowing what I want, or where to go.
Right, methinks it’s time for an old classic by The La’s because really, who the f***k knows what the future holds?
Anyway, come on, give me your ideas of songs that can bring a smile to your face when you’re feeling down?
The La’s – Who knows?