Wall wisdom

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“We only want to be happy!” (on my way to work)

Summer is slowly losing ground.

Tonight is hot, thunder echoes down the mountains, drowning out the rain’s gentle music on the roof. The children have only been back at school for three weeks, our new routine is still getting ironed out, I’m already feeling knackered.

I like my job, but it is crazy: There are twelve of us in the team, and everyone requires some level of care and attention- on top of my workload. When I get home, two children need my care and attention. In between, there are school meetings, sign-ups for activities, a car to service, medical appointments, bills to pay, no more clean socks in my son’s drawer. I have a headache, my sprained ankle is still hurting, and my knee has decided to join in for a laugh. I no longer have time to shave my legs: I wear trousers.

Days fly by in a haze of furious activity. I no longer read, write, play the guitar, or watch the first stars blink over the mountains. At night, I don’t feel much more than bone tired.

Still, the children seem happy enough, Mr Xmas keeps helping with some school pick-ups, my mum came to stay for a couple of days to give me a breather. And honestly, it’s not as if I feel unhappy. I just don’t have time for that.

Every morning as I cycle past this strangely poetic wall on my way to work, I am reminded that all any of us wants is to feel happy. Rather annoyingly, I no longer seem to have much time for that either…

Major Lazer – Powerful

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6 thoughts on “Wall wisdom

  1. Your post made me think how strange it is that we have to allow ourselves “time” for our feelings, to feel happy, or to feel unhappy. But I know what you mean. When you have to get on that bike every morning and get to work, there is just no time to reflect on how you really feel.

    • Hey Elizabeth, I agree, isn’t it strange?
      And interestingly, over the last couple of month, I’ve been learning to do just that in a meditation course: Make little times during the day where I have a quick “how are you?” moment with myself. It’s a funny little habit to get into. I haven’t had time to read any blogs either, but hoping to catch up, hope you’re well! x

  2. Well despite your exhaustiong, which isn’t surprising with everything going on…wow woman! I’m tired just reading! But I did get a laugh at your comment about wearing trousers. I live in Canada so we try to make light of the awful cold winter weather by telling ourselves that at least we don’t have to shave our legs for 6 months.
    I left you a very long winded email. I hope you receive it. I wasn’t sure if the yahoo account was the proper one. It was the one affiliated with your blog URL on the section where you commented.

    • I like the Canadian approach to Winter ;).
      And did get your email which was really interesting, gave me food for thought and a different perspective on Mr Xmas’ plight with bipolarity. Thanks ever so much. x
      PS. I did reply, not sure you got it though 😉

  3. Hey there Peter, I did get a nice little break in the UK in late October, actually.
    Back on the hamster wheel since the, but with the way the world is going, I’m just grateful we’re all well, fed, clothed, with a roof over our head and a lot of people who care.
    How have you been doing? Must catch up… 🙂 xxx

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