I peel myself from Mr Nice’s arms, and put my coat on to go to work. My heart is dancing.

I have been away on holiday, walked along this beach, visited precious friends, enjoyed my children, and forgotten about work… But for once, coming back may have been the best part of the holiday. Being able to bury myself into Mr Nice, and count the yellow flecks in his eyes on Sunday made me realise how much I had missed him.

I am still working through a lifetime of anxiety. And problems with children, exes, life (that sort of small fry) occasionally threaten to burst our little bubble, but overall, I think it’s official: I am ridiculously happy.

Happy to the point that it is sort of weird to read old posts from a year ago, and I find it hard to remember what pain felt like. Don’t get me wrong, I am still angry with T, but in a diffuse I-can’t-really-be-bothered sort of way.

Happy to the point of smiling at the sky, of forgetting about climate change and my rude colleague, of smothering my children in kisses. Happy to the point of thinking that regardless of the past, the future may be full of promises.

Thanks to Scriptor Obscura for introducing me to Nils Frahm – Kind, which curiously reminds me of how fragile happiness is, and how much I should cherish it.


20 thoughts on “Bubble

    • I know…It is so weird, how life can change so fast one way or another. It fell apart in January 2011, and came together again in January 2012. I still find it hard to believe.
      Hoping you find someone to share the new you wih soon,
      Ps. Looking forward to meeting you!!!

  1. Wonderful, wonderful, wonderful news!! I’m so happy for you….wow, I remember that feeling (just about) of dancing hearts and love-filled sighs 😀 You deserve all the happiness in the world xxxxx

    • Dear Emma,
      Thank you so much. I think having been through so much last year makes me appreciate what I have more. And I think that Mr Nice is a much better partner for me than T ever was…
      Let’s hope things carry on the way they have started.
      Ps. How was half term with the munchkins?

    • Dear Kim,
      Thank you so much! I have to say it feels nice to finally be able to share some good news…
      Do you also find that knowing how fragile happiness is somehow makes it taste better?
      Much love from the Spring-like French Alps,

    • Dear Pat,
      I’m glad I somehow made you smile. It is so good to be smiling again, I know you of all people will understand that.
      Hope the coming Spring brings you new reasons to smile,

  2. E,

    I’m so glad 2012 is working out for you. You deserve this new start. We have both begun journeys. We’re both hoping and happy. This past 12 months is finally over. Phew!

  3. Dear SD,
    I know, the contrast between this time last year and now is so striking, and I am so thankful to be this side of 2011.
    Hope to see you and Miss SD sometime this year…
    Meanwhile, keep in touch

  4. YAY! I currently chanting “Nice Guys in Twenty-twelve”! There’s a dance move, too, but I’ll have to show you that in person. This has got to be our year, right? Although we were only sharing our suffering for a fraction of 2011, I feel like it’s been ages. Hopefully, by 2013 we’ll be remembering only happiness…

    • Ha, I wanna see the dance move!!!
      And yes, it would only be fair, wouldn’t it, to get a great big, long-lasting chunk of happiness from now on.
      Funny isn’t it, how heartbreak is a bit like child-birth, in the sense that it hurts like f***, you swear off it for the rest of your life, and then you just forget and do it all again…

    • Hey Jacqueline, thanks! I do hope this new found happiness will be of the long distance kind… But for now, I’m just enjoying it.
      Hope you soon get the break you deserve … Meanwhile, take care x

    • Thank you Tat2d!
      Yes, it makes a nice change to be feeling good and optimistic when looking at the future. Hope things soon look up for you too. x

  5. Hey, I tagged you to answer some questions! (Don’t worry, I won’t be offended if you don’t have time to do this, but I would be interested to read your answers.)

    • Hey there,
      Ok, thank you for the tagging, and I will give it some thought.
      Keeping my fingers xed for you and The Artist. I hope he’s sorted his head out. You deserve to be treated well…

  6. “Regardless of the past, the future may be full of promises”– wow. That is exactly what I needed to hear. Thanks, Lady E! You always say it best.

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