Momentary lapse of reason

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Something weird happened during one of my many moments of wallowing in self-pity before Christmas.

I was idly checking my email box, which was appropriately empty save for a promotional message from the French railway company and a super important message from PayPal, when – before I knew what was happening, I’d clicked on the ad-link to the right of the screen (damn those clever marketing bods), entered all my particulars into a profile, and whipped out my credit card.

Heaven help me, I have joined an internet dating site…

I got instantly inundated with lazy, inane, impersonal, bland blurbs, or at best poorly spelt two-liners devoid of any punctuation, from people with as few of the characteristics I expressed an interest in as can be… On reflection, perhaps I do need to spell out that having a pulse and living in France isn’t quite enough?

Anyway, politely rebuffing wannabe Mister Es – or would they have to be Sir Es by association, I wonder…, and simply managing my inbox quickly turned into a full-time job. Ok, so see how two paragraphs ago, I was complaining because my inbox was empty? And now I am complaining because it is too full?… Mmmm, I wonder if perhaps I am not the sweet, easy-going, glass half-full kind of gal every single bloke in the Rhône-Alpes region seems to be looking for?

Blast…

Oh well, hum,… anyway, I have dates. In fact, as I write this, I am about to set off on my first date, and I am mildly intrigued, a little bit excited, but mostly scared senseless. So, this is a personal message to the voice inside my head still whispering “T left you because you’re not good enough”: Feck off, and let me get on with my life, will you?

For some reason I cannot work out, I have been under this song’s spell for the last couple of days. It’s literally called the gold-digger but I hasten to clarify that this title does not in any way relate to the above post 😉

Arthur H- Le chercheur d’or

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12 thoughts on “Momentary lapse of reason

  1. In my discussions with friends, you’re embarking on a complicated journey. There are ‘rules’ and ‘understandings’ that may not seem obvious at first. One example is the kind of privacy you may need to maintain in initial contact. I strongly recommend you find a friend with experience with online dating to avoid both unnecessary disappointment and the wrong kind of interest.

    Having said all that… good luck and I see you’re getting off to a flying start in 2012! Yay you!

    Cheers, SD xxx.

    • Don’t say that SD, I’m scared enough as it is…
      Seriously, I know you’re right and I have tried to be careful and really filtered through who I was willing to meet or not.
      Let’s hope my instinct’s right, and if I make friends rather than meet the new Mr E (I think you need to rule on this SD, is it gonna be Mister or Sir?), it’ll be nice too.
      xx

      • LOL, you’re right — since I named you “Lady E” so long ago, then I think I get naming rights on the new beau!

        I think we should call him: the new Sir E.

        We know he needs to be a gentleman and a gentle knight, and this adds formality to it.

    • All right date update coming up, then: It went well, Mr Québec was an exceptionally bright mind academically, who’d only just started to tweak about why he may have been a lousy hubby. Credits to him for getting there. Nice enough bloke to become friends with but nomore I’m afraid…x

  2. During my Christmas shopping, a young woman (27) said to me, “Don’t go thinking there’s something wrong with you just because some man left you.” I think that’s really good advice and so I’m passing it on to you. Turn off that little voice in your head. Have fun!

    • Thanks Pat. That young woman was obviously wise. I’m working on turning the little voice off, but crikey, it’s hard to rub off 38 years’ worth of ingrained beliefs…`
      xx

  3. I have no experience of internet dating sites but add my warnings to those above. Be very very careful about personal information you share with strangers. Having said that ..have fun and don’t worry whether this is the next Sir E. If it is meant to happen then it will.

    • Hey Judith, happy new year to you!!
      I’m trying to be cautious, and to have fun, and to not be my over-analysing, anxious self, but golly, that’s hard work too!
      Think I’m going to enjoy going out though…:) x

  4. Lady E, I think internet dating is a wonderful warm-up for real dating — lots of positive, affirming attention, you get to pick and choose whom you’d like to meet, and it provides a nice distraction when you get to feeling rotten.

    At the risk of sounding unintentionally patronizing, I’m very proud of you for taking such a brave step. This means you are beginning to imagine a new future for yourself, and that is a very important step down the road to your happiness. Bravo!

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